There's a reason I don't say things right away. Maybe I'm not ready to deal with it myself, let alone have you try to deal with it.
So yes, something's wrong. No, it isn't you. It's me. Kind of.
There's a reason I don't say things right away. Maybe I'm not ready to deal with it myself, let alone have you try to deal with it.
So yes, something's wrong. No, it isn't you. It's me. Kind of.
I am capable of baiting my own hook, but I would rather have someone else do it for me. I have a collection of teacups. I am almost incapable of folding a fitted sheet—my Great-Grandmother would be devastated.
Playing guitar only works if you can also sing, playing piano is more impressive. I can be extremely selfish, but if I care about you I will do anything in my power for you. One of my best friends is a guy, I tell him things I should probably only tell my girl friends. I buy movies that I’ve never seen before with the hope that I will love them.
I only really like crispy french fries.
I’m awful at packing, and I will always pack too much. I just like to be prepared. I love being kissed on the forehead. And when guys hold doors open for me. When a guy can drive a stick shift I find it incredibly sexy.
I will never have an interest in playing golf. Although, I don’t mind watching.
I’m going to grow my hair out this winter. Well, I’m going to try.
I’m perfectly happy to sit on the couch knitting for hours, as long as music is on. My cats are extremely important to me, but it scares me that I could potentially have them into my late thirties. I love live music, it doesn’t even really matter what it is. I’m an extremely sexual person.
If I’m interested in you, I will just want to sit and look at you. It’s the only time that sitting in silence really doesn’t bother me.
I've written about you. In fact my draft folder is filled with posts about you right now. I write about you when you go back to sleep in the morning or when I'm just watching you from across the room. I just haven't published them, haven't wanted people to actually read them. That's the thing, I have this blog to share my thoughts, and to share my ordinary day, but sometimes what I write is more for me. I need to figure out what's in my head. To put things down before I forget them, or they don't seem important. And the thought of someone saying what's important to me isn't important at all, well it just sucks.
So here it is. I like sitting next to you on the couch while you're playing video games and you're yelling at the TV. I like that you try to explain the game to me, although I'm pretty sure you realize that I have like no clue what you're talking about. And I like watching you play chess, whether you win or lose... although you were pretty cute when you won. I like just doing nothing with you in the morning. I like that you actually enjoyed watching Juno. I like that you pretend to be offended when I call you sweet, because you want to be the tough guy. I like that you make me laugh, constantly. And I like that you'll read this, and that you are trying to read it right now as I'm writing.
So here it is. Don't think the reason I hadn't written about you was because I didn't want to. I was worried you wouldn't want me to write about you. Or that if I did write about you, you wouldn't like what I said. So maybe one day all of the posts in my draft folder will come out, or maybe I'll just save them so I can read them, but either way... know that they are there.
I'm pretty good when it comes to speaking my mind, I am honest even to the point of hurting people sometimes. However, with certain people or certain topics, I'm afraid to say what I'm thinking. So here is a list of the things I wish I could say...
Why do you feel the need to wear SO much makeup? It makes you look incredibly ugly.
We all know you're smart, and we don't care, so stop acting like you're better than everyone.
I worry about you when you're at school, I sometimes think you might be having too much fun.
I think you're making a huge mistake, and what makes it worse, is that I know you know it.
I still think about you, yes, after three years.
I like that you live far away. The fact that we only see each other a few times a year makes our friendship special.
I admit that I have a good time when we are mocking people, but would it kill you to say something nice about someone? Just once.
Do you keep those pictures of me in your office because you can't put them in your house?
Can you please stop meowing at me? It's starting to drive me crazy.
Okay, so that last one was to my cat. Seriously though, I say that to him dozens of times a day, and since he has no clue what I'm saying sometimes I start to question myself if I'm saying it out loud or in my head... so now I feel like it's out of my head. Laugh all you want.
I eat fruit loops in reverse rainbow order. I still don't really like when different foods touch on my plate, but I no longer freak out about it.
I love, love, LOVE getting pedicures, but despise manicures. I feel prettier with nice underwear on. I wish I had time to take a bubble bath everyday. I save my magazines for years at a time, just in case. I'm embarrassingly addicted to MTV reality shows.
I think that giving roses is really cliché, and I might laugh at you if you try to give them to me.
I hate when my feet are cold, but I REALLY hate wearing socks. I often leave the TV on just to have some background noise, I hate silence. Wearing big sunglasses makes me feel pulled together, even if I'm in sweats.
I'm a horrible speller. I still sleep with a stuffed animal I've had since I was a little kid, and a squishy purple pillow. It takes me hours to fall asleep without my sound machine. I dance around my room in my bra and underwear all the time.
I love sleeping naked. I wonder if there is such a thing as "the one."
I don't know which scares me more, that people wont read this or that they will. I want a Tiffany engagement ring, I already know which one. I procrastinate on everything. I find the idea of working everyday for the rest of my life to be very boring.
I constantly wonder what my sisters are like. I wish I could truly hate my father. I'm terrified of disappointing my mother. She is one of my best friends.
Most of my good friends are guys. I always sing in my car. I bite my nails in my sleep. I have sat through an entire ANTM marathon. I laugh at my mother when she talks to our dogs in Arabic, but I find myself doing it when she's not here.
I hate needy guys. I'd rather spend time alone than out with a group of people. I've never been to a movie alone. I spend too much time picking out the clothes I'm going to wear. I don't think I could ever date someone who is shorter than I am.
Driving through a car wash creeps me out.
I wish I could fold my tongue into a four-leaf clover. I know I look better with short hair, but I love the versatility of long hair. I love banana ice cream. I wish I could spend more time with my Great Aunt Betsey. I'm starting to really like the idea of living in Portland.
I'm a college student, living life one day at a time.
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